What a year we have had together. Words fail me , how do I express feelings ofoverwhelming joy to heart break. God knew what he was doing when he gave me you two.
Baby A,
You my boy have took your mama's heart. Never did I think we would walk the journey we are on together. I will never forget the day we were transferred and the cardiologist met us in our room. Daddy, me with Seamus in my arms and the midwife sitting on the bed as he began to explain what this diagnosis would look like. On a clip board he drew a diagram of a normal heart and then he drew a diagram of your heart. I remember the words but not being able to full grasp the gravity of what he was saying. I looked at our midwife and tears were rolling down her cheeks. At 6 days old I held you begging God to let you stay. I didn't know if that was the last time I'd see you. Not many will ever understand what it is like to watch your baby fight with all they have against a failing heart, to see them after surgery, to sign consent to something you know could very well end their lives.
The months that followed were the most difficult days I have ever walked but every day to be with you was worth it.
The tears have flowed and the ache inside me is daily. You have taught us what love looks like. Each moment with you is amazing. You have taught me to enjoy and fully embrace motherhood and to remember that you are God's first.
Baby B,
Seamus. What a beautiful reflection of God's love and kindness you are. Every single day for a year you have woke me up with your infectious smile. When I see you I am amazed you are mine. Your soul is so gentle, I feel like I can see who you are already.
People always talk about the special connection twins have, but to see it in all its beauty and intricacy is beyond amazing. I hope you always appreciate that bond. Every night when I crawl into bed and you two are cuddled up together melts me. I say it over and over " I can't believe they are mine".
Your journeys, though, will be your own. You'll pave your own paths and take your own risks and earn your own triumphs and endure your own heartbreaks. Wherever that leads, Mommy and Daddy believe in you and we'll never ask you to be anything other than who you are. But most of all we are behind you cheering you both on.
No comments:
Post a Comment